Imagine if every time you took a sip off your drink on stage, you were barraged by Ziggy-Socky, Ziggy-Socky - like trained apes banging verbal cymbals together on cue? You'd want me dead, too. Even though we milked a few extra dollars out of that pig by keeping it alive another year, at least we refused to keep that moronic catch-phrase alive. It went "Ziggy-Socky, Ziggy-Socky, Hoy Hoy Hoy!" and then their gaping mouths would open like urinals for their prize of beer.īut we put a stop to that shit. They had a catch-phrase too and the fucking tomato-headed fans waited like fat children with full bladders to hear it. I did the Man Show and I didn't even have kids to feed. I don't yet have keychains, toddler wear and foam beer coozies on my website yet. I've been out there on Whore Street before myself. Listen, captain, I'm not saying I'm better 'n you. Same way a NASCAR fan would never jokingly yell "Dale Ernhardt" if you were doing a joke about bad drivers. I mean, since they think that "Git Er Done" is "comedy", they would have a false sense of reverence about reiterating that in a comedy atmosphere if you had tragically passed on to Jesus. If you were to Die Tragically, then people would stop saying it. Surely you can make em stop repeating your mantra. These people laugh at commercials for car insurance. I don't know how you stop it but - I mean, seriously - these people are puddle-noggins. He doesn't even know what it means or why he's sayin it! Larry, I'm sure you're a great guy and all but please, you have to make this stop. Now it's the moment Gavin has been waiting for all week - to bellow out all the knowledge that you've impregnated him with - "Git Er Done!" It used to be that you could use pause as a tool to enhance the timing and effectiveness of a bit. Do you see why we needed to talk to you about it? At anytime, even when - especially when - it doesn't even make any sense. Now, you went and gave em a catch-phrase to scream. But until you came along, these people were usually too bereft of thought to ever speak out, save for the occasional Yee-Haw. We go in, drink all the courage we can find and try to fulfill our contractual obligation. You see, all of us road comics have to perform for these same nutlogs that enjoy your act. Out loud.Īre you getting me, Larry? (It is ok if I call you Larry? Great.) I mean, no one can blame you for taking the Wal-Mart approach of appealing to the absolute stupidest, water-brained Velveeta cheese flag-monkeys on the planet - no offense - but what you've gone and done is given them something to *say*. It's just that, you know me and some of the other guys out there on the road have been having problems *phew* (puts hand on shoulder and lowers voice) I mean, I'm good friends with that Ron White fella and I think he's one of the funniest guys in the industry. I don't know if we've ever met but my name is Doug Stanhope and I do stand-up comedy too! It's a crazy old bizness we're in, ain't it? Ohhhh goodness.
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